Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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