omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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