your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
We're not piercing ourselves today.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
