Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Do vagina's smell?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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