were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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