Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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