What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?