just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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