how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
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The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
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I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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