I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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