remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
this beer tastes like vomit already
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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