Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?