i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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