it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Randomize
