in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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