I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
