she is the kim kardashian of front butts
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Drunk is a universal language darling
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
