god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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