How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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