party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
