best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
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