there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize