I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
