grandma shit on top of the toilet
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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