Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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