Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
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It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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