My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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