Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
