dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
