I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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