i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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