That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
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