I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
