I must be too annoying 4 u.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Randomize
