she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
