And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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