She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
