You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
