i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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