We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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