spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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