I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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