Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
It's just like the Real World with babies
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You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
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you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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