My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
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