the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
