i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
He better not be in your backpack
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
