It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize
