She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize