we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
