Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
