Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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