We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
