Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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